Archive for March, 2013

Excerpts of my UPOU MAN November, December, January, February diary entries…

Friday, March 15th, 2013

What LittleNars did during blog hiatus…

Just to give you an update regarding my master of arts in nursing studies at University of the Philippines Open University…

This semester was a series of ups and downs… I want to give you some excerpts of my monthly diary since the start of the semester just to give you a glimpse of what I was doing the whole time I am not blogging…

November

Work is also demanding, our hospital census was also high and I always come home with exhaustion. I wasn’t able to follow the submission dates in my learning contract and I am a week late again for the journal review and patient symptomatology, it is a bit frustrating, I must hurry but I don’t want to submit work without quality, I am taking my time… one step at a time (but not so much.) I say, PUSH.

December

The semester is very short for the demands of the subject. I mean, how could you possibly submit requirements weekly, do your work, be a friend, a partner, daughter, sister and more all at the same time without fail… I must be a superhuman if so… Another week has passed and the work is piling up. December really is a “toxic” month especially that it is the holiday season. Still, I will not give up and will fight stress. May God give me the strength and wisdom to fulfill all these.

I must admit, I gave in to my social life and neglected my studies. This is also a week of me having thoughts and was on the verge of dropping out because it seems that I cannot cope up with the requirements, the works seems to be eating me alive when I think of it. I cannot sleep or concentrate very well. I think of school despite of those party times with friends and family

My classmates were also planning of dropping out and some dropped out already. I was very down and confused. As I reflected and thought of it, with the help of my mom’s advice, prayers to God and encouragement of my friends, I realized that it is not in my personality to give up easily. I am almost there… On the other note, I am also thinking of the money and time I will waste if I decided to drop this course and so… I did not and here I am now, cramming and bouncing back up again towards finishing my masters.

Christmas is just around the corner and I am still here swarming with readings and paper works. Nevertheless, I accept it because this is what I wanted and this is where I wanted to be.

January

It was like, I froze in doing what I needed to do. I was exhausted yet again. I was emotional at the start of the year with having a baggage to bring from year 2012. It was not a good start for me because I was really questioning myself to a point of regretting what I started, which is of course taking this masters degree. I mean, this feeling is expected especially when you are in a lot of pressure with all the aspect of your life and thinking that you are still young (23 years old) and you should be having fun instead of being serious about studying once again, I mean? I just got out of school. That mentality made me paralyzed and I hope the coming week would give me some motivation and hopefully find my eager and productive self once again.

On the other side, it seems to me that no matter what pressure and constant reminding of others and my own self, I seem to work slower and feel more demotivated. I don’t know what’s happening but I seriously want to finish this. I told myself to take one baby step at a time, as long as I am accomplishing something I am doing something to finish all these requirements.

I don’t know if you experienced it, but I am always in a dilemma of opening my laptop and staring at a blank word document for hours because I don’t know how to start and where to start with all the needed things to do. I am starting to get a feeling that every diary entry is a rant for the things to do rather the things to accomplish and I am sorry with that.

February

For all the requirements, I felt that two weeks is short. I hope we all can finish everything and I am already looking forward to that. Our meeting ended at 6:30PM, that was how long we discussed and brainstormed. It was draining because we have our own requirements to make and we also have to be as a team to be able to finish other requirements. I am worried but I promised myself that I will not end the last practicum experience without accomplishing everything.

The true beauty of this profession is seeing your patients get well after having been admitted for a long time that you thought they won’t surpass their health’s decline. When you see them appreciate you and commended you for your good and competent work, that is when you feel rewarded personally and professionally. We, nurses know for a fact that our profession doesn’t have a great pay but it’s the patient’s good feedback that counts the most.

This week is a busy week. I honestly don’t know if I can finish this all in 2 weeks and I only got 1 week left. I just got to trust God and myself in fulfilling this endeavour for all I know, everything that is gained through hard work has a good outcome if not now but in the near future.

Health is ever changing. It is very complex as the person, family or community we care for. We as nurses should also take part in continuing education endeavors. What I really appreciate in this practicum is to how I can identify the difference in our institution/hospital versus the culture at UP-PGH as well as the UPCN.

Old routine can be proven ineffective nowadays through related studies. Since we are in a private hospital, we should possess and implement excellent and ideal nursing care to our patients. We would like for patients to come back because of good nursing and medical management right? And not only for the facilities and machines.

I realized that it is not easy to be a teacher especially that you are dealing with the life and the future of the students. You need to be an expert in your own specialty and possess the right way of dealing with the students. You not only to be knowledgeable with the curriculum available but also knowledgeable to make one and implement one according to the standards. I also learned about self-discovery learning. I was so used to “spoon feeding” method of learning even though we were already in college. I just learned to acquire it when I enrolled at UPOU.

All my objectives were met and I am glad that duty days are over. We will all go back to our normal lives as an overworked and underpaid staff nurse. I will surely miss this and the company of my classmates… now friends! Let’s get this requirements finished PRONTO!

The above are fragments of my weekly diary entries as a requirement for the semester. They are not really meant to be related as it is shown in this blog post. Pardon for those who became confused.

I would like to thank Dean Araceli Balabagno, Professor Rita Ramos and Professor Ina Ragotero for all the knowledge, continuous follow-up and the opportunity of learning. We couldn’t have reached this point without you. I will forever be grateful.

Dear readers, sorry for so much drama. This was indeed a very emotional semester in my UPOU life.

LittleNars Intensive Practicum at UP PGH for UPOU MAN…

Friday, March 15th, 2013

So where is LittleNars with her MAN studies?

The Master of Arts in Nursing at University of the Philippines Open University is based on a clinical perspective curriculum. I have already finished the academic units and by that I mean all the theoretical part of the degree (27 units), I am currently a 3rd year MA student, enrolled in a subject called Intensive Practicum where in it is a culmination of all the things that we have learned since first year. It is really not a online study/distance learning solely. It is a 2-week clinical practicum at PGH (Philippine General Hospital) wherein we get to be a clinician, educator and researcher that happened last February.

The experience was fun-filled, self-directed learning with my classmates. We were only 17 left from 100+ who enrolled in the first year. It was very timely for me since this January, I was entitled for a vacation leave credits at work and so I didn’t have any problems filing for leave of absence and suffer a month without salary. I was saddened by the fact that my first ever vacation leave as an employed citizen of the Philippines was put to my studies. I mean, I have given up so much with this master degree (even this blog)… The good thing is, I got to be a student once again with my classmates without thinking of work.

At PGH At CI

I got to be a clinician at the UP PGH- Cancer Institute

Discussion with Dean Cel

We had discussion sessions with Dean Balabagno (our faculty in charge)

Seminar

We had conducted a seminar for the 4th year UP BSN students

Library work Conference room

Library Works with my classmates

2013-02-14 09.44.22 2013-02-14 09.47.20

I got to be an educator for the 4th year UP BSN student at UP PGH Ward 1 Medical Ward

Requirmeents

The toxic thing was the completion of the requirements from the start of the semester up to the last.

It was consuming us because most of us are working and we cannot really focus on making our homeworks. I have been ranting in my Twitter account.

Having my clinical practicum at UP-PGH is like coming out of my comfort zone. Work with familiar people is like a routine for me, I can confidently go on duty as a single staff but having to work and learn from a different environment, culture and people… It made me test my “flexibility” and adaptive skills. I miss my undergraduate years, seeing the students and my workmates who became my friends but the good thing is, I gain new friends that supported each other with all the needed things to accomplish for this semester. They were like my extended family who motivates me to continue and pursue this endeavour. With that, I am very much grateful.

Dean

I have already come this far, I will not simply give up. I am currently completing my thesis proposal for pilot testing so that I can take the comprehensive exam by next semester.

So help me GOD.

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